The Uses Of An Electric Toothbrush
Now normal people will only use an electric toothbrush for what it should be used for and that is brushing your teeth, however, it has been brought to my attention that this world isn’t entirely full of "norms". In fact there are more insane nutters with electric toothbrushes than I thought, so here are the top ten uses of an electric toothbrush!
Masturbation - Now masturbation is a fine art not to be taken lightly but at least three times a day. It can be applied to any part of the genitals but for best effect it pushes forward so apply force into the body.
Cleaning - Now cleaning with your toothbrush is quite a hard thing to do because it has a small head but a longish neck. This means it’s good for getting those hard to reach places: for example your nasal hair, any unwanted ear wax that you can’t reach, or perhaps between your toes. It can also be used for cleaning the house with! You know when you find some unwanted hippies in your garden tree?? Why not just clean up with your electric toothbrush, and they’ll soon go away!
Walking - To properly walk your toothbrush you should buy an extendable leash so your toothbrush can go and sniff sexually arousing women’s crutches and bring you drooling.
Feeding - You can feed your toothbrush in any manner of ways: such as giving it some plaque, or some nice tasting mint toothpaste. However, the average user of their fully adaptable toothbrush finds it more arousing to spread yogurt over it or ones self. Then to either lick the toothbrush clean or to get the brush to do some work for a change.
Keeping Fit - To keep your toothbrush in top physical condition (you never know when you might need it) you should let it work out regularly and watch its batteries grow stronger by the day, watch it flex its bristles and that marvelous plastic physique.
Racing - Because your electric toothbrush is electric, it can move all by itself. So when put on track (you choose where) it will almost definitely win against other pathetic toothbrushes e.g. ones that don’t have batteries in them.
Sex - Sex is a brilliant way to keep fit, especially when accompanied by your toothbrush. Your playmate may be a bit wary of your toothbrush at first, and may get jealous after they see what you do with it. But eventually they will learn to live with it and even use it from time to time.
Gardening - This is a wonderful way to spend time together with your toothbrush. You can spend time lounging in your deck chair together or digging around in the mud together.
D.I.Y. - This is a great way to use your electric toothbrush. Be careful that it doesn’t get splinters, as it will hurt the poor little bristles. Because the head moves in a circular fashion it can be used as a sander, circular saw or a drill.
Masturbation - As masturbation is used widely (as far as my sources tell me) I shall suggest it twice.
These are the top 10 uses of an electric toothbrush and how to care for it so go have fun!
